Paperthin Hymns

If there's one thing I learned from no-longer-underground band Anberlin, it's that "youth fades and glory days deceive".

The sad but relevant truth of my current status as a non-entity has caused me to launch headlong into a solo-listening party of Anberlin's 2005 album "Never Take Friendship Personal", a throwback to my not-so-long-ago college years. Living in the city has taught me a few things, first and foremost that I am only as cool as my friends and what I do. In school, it was how quickly you typed an essay the day it was due or the amount of people you slept with (who am I kidding, that still happens now). I've slowly been transitioning from quirky, live out loud, say what I'm thinking gal to "yes, I can finish that before I sleep" gal. I have dreams about talking to PR reps and ordering products. I wake up wondering how many emails I've gotten to my Blackberry. My weekends are spent calculating how my upcoming week is going to turn out.

I could extend the list to include vacations that are not vacations, merely trips out to the Midwest for weddings that are lightly masquerading as breaks. They are the Lady Gaga of time outs. And not to be bested by that is my raging (suspected) ulcer, which threatens to make every meal I eat a test of will. The Catch 22 of this whole thing? I can't even afford to go to the doctor.

God Bless the current situation in the American Economy. Please, feel free to rob me of any youthful thoughts and dreams and suspend me in a fat-free hell of my own making. And there is no fun in no fat, lemme tell ya.